Miss Manners
You wouldn’t know it by looking at me or the way he raised me but my dad loves Miss Manners. He really does. He also loves sending me Miss Manner’s column from the Washington Post. This time it was pretty interesting.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Can you explain why North Americans use a fork in their right hand and Europeans, from whom many of us descend, always use the left hand?
GENTLE READER: What, again?
Oh, dear, please forgive Miss Manners that unseemly outburst. She ought to be grateful that you asked. It is just that she has explained this so many times, and yet people persist in believing that American table manners deteriorated from their traditional European roots.
The opposite is true. The European method blossomed in America but was severely pruned in Europe.
A brief history: Europe, with the exception of Italy, adapted tardily and reluctantly to the use of the fork. As late as the early 19th century, some British country aristocrats were still holding out for tradition by declaring, “My grandfather ate with his knife, and it’s good enough for me.”
Knives, spoons and fingers were the implements of choice to spear, slurp and grab. Only one was needed at a time, so only the right hand was used. When the fork gradually came into European use, it, too, was brought to the mouth from only the right hand.
This was the correct European way of eating, and European settlers brought it to America, where it remains the correct method.
But in relatively modern times, Europeans started speeding things up by keeping the fork in the left hand even after it is used to steady food that is being cut by a knife held in the right hand.
Those who point out that the European manner is more efficient are right. Those who claim it is older or more sophisticated — etiquette has never considered getting food into the mouth faster a mark of refinement — are wrong.
If you remember my stories from the early days of my little life in Holland, you’ll probably recall when I would rant about how the family I was living with ate the euro way and seemed to think that it was superior or something. Well, the truth is finally here. And by the way, I believe Miss Manners 100%. She’s the smartest person in the world.
